5、18th June Tuesday 2002 Shenyang ...
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Elke ketter heeft zijn letter
(everyone has his own reason)
Woke up at 6 am again, Ling still laid in bed quietly with no signs of hurry, Tuesday, the only day of the whole week she didn’t have to get up early. She was free on Tuesday.
It had been a very explosive family weekend.
Bamboo had announced her wedding date to be 5th of Augustus after a one- night -stand with her aunt Lily on Friday after her date. Lily was the only single woman aged over 35 in the whole family, she convinced Bamboo to make the right decision in no time.
What is real love? After years of searching and waiting, Lily knew there would never going to be a right choice, there would never going to be a right moment, one had to be realistic, catch him if you can, catch him when you can, it could be a bad step of a chess game, but as a player you’d still have chance and time to correct it, however an audience may scream out but still remains an audience.
Life is but a few dozen years, she had a rather nice position in the city government, a rather nice flat, loads expensive clothes and cosmetics, so what? No one to share with, be sadness or joy. But that was not the worst point, what really irritated her were the fingers from those women behind her back, rumoring all possible fictions a single old woman might or mightn’t relate, an underground concubine of some mayor or a born hypoplastic nun who refused to admit.
The truth frustrated Lily as well. She never dreamed a man on white horse, just someone who talks, listens, not after her governmental connections, not someone else’s husband. That must have been far too much to ask, she found no one and cost almost all her family ties for the shame of the very fact.
The 3 nieces of her became her best friends over the years as they learned sense from their education. But she would never, never let any of them follow her way, she would see to it. They didn’t understand yet the odds of the society were constantly against single aged woman, those who dumped by their husbands can easily win all the sympathy even tears, but never the singles. It meant one had to wed once no matter with whom.
Bamboo was an honest girl, too honest maybe to ask questions like if she really loved the boy, or the boy’s money, Deng’s family stinks with money, he was the only son, and crazy about Bamboo, chasing after her for two years watching her other boyfriends coming and going. He talked very little, too little actually; Bamboo’s father couldn’t bear to spend 10 minutes with him alone.
That also frustrated Bamboo, he never had his own ideas about anything, Bamboo had the say where to go for lunch, what menu to take, which cinema to go and what film to watch; he just stayed around, simply nodding or giving some noises as answers whenever asked twice. A far from handsome person, no taste for cloths, never good at school, the only thing he was good at was that he never gave up on something if he really wanted it.
He wanted Bamboo for years, never dared to tell till asked two years ago when Bamboo had been dumped by someone else. Bamboo enjoyed the easy money, enjoyed his company as well, so relax that she never needed to waste any brains on choosing what to wear, but was that then enough for a marriage? Endless watching TV Super Show every night since he wouldn’t talk?
The poor girl even burst into tears, blew two boxes of Lily’s facial tissues away before the big decision. For years Lily hadn’t seen Bamboo cry, so she let her go. After all, it was not going to be an easy deal as the chance of recourse would be minimum. There would be no win-win in life. You gain something here lose something there and never reach balance.
The next day Lily talked with Tiffany, an □□ of 30 who was childishly having a cold war with another □□ Bamboo of 28.
Lily learned better to talk with the two separately then together, as a matter of fact Lily knew for long that although Tiffany always sounded very authoritative, she was the weaker one among all the 3.
Tiffany followed an education chose by her father, married on the date set by her father and lived in the house given by her father. She never asked herself about if she did really want all these to be happened as it was, she just believed her father should be right. She was the eldest of the three as constantly reminded by her father, she had to make the rules and set examples for the other two as there was no son in the family.
The little sister Ling had never been a problem child, but the terrible Bamboo seemed never surrender, which was the truth. Bamboo followed some Police education to the very anger of her father and became a Traffic Police Woman that finally exhausted her father’s anger. He cleaned her out of his house for half a year already. But secretively, the old man never forgot to remind Lily keep an eye on any of Bamboo’s boy friends who might dare to marry that wild beast, that would be the best way to cancel her out of his life, he added.
Later that night Tiffany shared the news with Roc and Ling, she was still shocked by the wedding date,
“5th Augustus, what the hell is wrong with her, do you still remember how long did it take us to prepare for our wedding?” she turned to Roc, “Inform all families, friends, take photo albums, shop for all items a new home would need, physical tests, book restaurants, renting cars, music band and camera men, god, how can we arrange everything in just one month time?” She couldn’t bear the fact to be considered incapable to arrange her sister’s wedding.
Ling and Roc looked at each other rather amused, “Are you sure it’s Bamboo’s wedding you are worrying about?” Roc teased his wife, he felt guilty of their cold war because of his pride.
“She is a terrible beast, but part of the family after all,” a best ever comment Tiffany could offer.
“So you will talk with Bamboo for a schedule to get all those things down?” Roc wanted to give a push.
“Sure I will tell her the schedule when I am ready with it.” Roc shook his head, not disapproval, but gave up. There were only two areas that a psychologist would need help from a fellow professional, his family and he himself, the second was much easier to deal with.
“Did anyone tell pa and ma already? If they were skipped from this kind of news, there might be no wedding in the end, not an easy one at least.” Ling swore she was not trying to look for barriers for Bamboo’s marriage, she mustn’t be the last one who was not really pleased with the big news, her father must be still mad at Bamboo.
“I wish I had the chance to tell them, but Lily has done it already. Of course pa is happy to get rid of the second daughter before 30 as well.” First time ever, she realized that she was that thankful about her father’s enthusiasm to clean out all his daughters. “Are you eager to escape from pa too?” Tiffany black humored her little sister well aware of her horror, time flies, the litter sister turned 23 already.
“Oh, not in a million years as long as he is not going to kick me out.” Ling was really terrified to appreciate Tiffany’s humor.
The next day her nightmare came true. Her parents drove to Shenyang in their Jeep from the nearby town where they live to invite families and the 3 daughters plus one present son in law and one future son in law for dinner in Hot Pot City, to declare a father’s victory of discard another daughter. The families were actually very pleased at Deng, that generation appreciate very much the quality of a young man who talks little acts more, besides, they never knew before that his father was the newly promoted director of the CCIB (China Commercial & Industrial Bank) Shenyang Branch. No wonder the family stink with money.
The dinner became endless and topics were extended to everything when alcohol, beer and wine fought their way up to those people’s brains, Ling never dared to fake sick to go away as Bamboo often did, but Bamboo couldn’t leave her fiancé under those uncles’ eyes twinkling with money signs tonight, he might nod up to ten open amount loan requests if she’d leave him alone.
At that point Ling made the mistake. She refused to have more wine when one of the uncles filling everyone’s glasses the Nth time. The uncle suddenly realized the existence of Ling neglected by them all from the very beginning. Then interviews started from her personal data, education, her work and then inevitably to her dating status.
“No boy friend yet?! You father should have told us, we will look after that,” promised one of the uncles,
“Uh, My job does require a lot of time and attention, I don’t think I’d have time for anything else.” Ling tried to rescue herself and gave Tiffany a hint for help.
“That’s right, Ling should spend more time for a career now,” first help came from Bamboo,
“Besides she is still far too young”, Tiffany got the hint too. Only when Ling in need would the other two cooperate indeed.
“Oh, come on, you two are the real late marriages of our family, our grandson is already 5 years old from you cousin of similar age who married at 22.” One of the aunt beat the savors in one sentence, then she turned to Ling “23 is not young any more, you got to think about your future, where would a career bring you to? A respectful woman has to get a family and raise children.”
This time, not only Ling turned pale on those words, Lily too. And the bomber didn’t know to stop at the right moment, “You don’t want to be another Lily, do you?” she continued.
That was too much for Lily; even all the 3 sisters were crossed.
“I will be very happy if I can be the same Lily, not another.” Ling took the first revenge, Lily was dragged down because of her problem, god, she didn’t have any problems.
“If Lily is happy with her own career and her own life, why can’t others be happy for her too?” that was Tiffany.
“Even if she is not always happy, so does everybody. She never needed to fight with anyone for her own facial treatment.” Bamboo completed the first round of defense, as sharp as ever. She knew the husband of the bomber was famous for his stinginess.
“oh, Brother,” the bomber turned to the sisters’ father for justice, “ what on earth happened with the manner of your children, or do they treat you always in this way as well?” rather an accusation then a question, “Lily is my cousin, when did I loss the right to some immature nieces?” ha, a pure victim.
“Now we are immature again, you just told Ling she is not young anymore.” This time Tiffany and Bamboo together.
“That is enough!” their father’s face turned green, “Tiffany, you disappointed me in the way you behave just like the hopeless wild beast, and, you” he turned to Ling, “a few penny from the capitalists already changed your character, I shouldn’t allow you to give up your job in the state primary school. Now apologize to your aunt.”
Felt extremely awkward with the presence of their partners, the two sisters chose silent resistance policy.
It was Ling and Lily who apologized at the end. They both would hate it if they became the reason to spoil a family dinner. The price they paid, as a matter of fact they were still going to pay, was that they each agreed for a set up soon arranged by the family match-making net.
“Oh, that was a real nightmare.” Ling successfully ignored it on busy Monday, but now she realized what kind of problems they created. No way to fake sick. She couldn’t be sick everyday. Besides, what she really feared was not a set up dinner with any strange guy, but the follow up. She had to go out with one of them to stop the endless stupid set ups. She had to ask Lily for advice.
“How on earth could you survive for these many years?” Ling asked later in the evening at Lily’s apartment enjoy ready to be served a nice dinner without shaking the frying pan herself.
“From what?”
“Those set ups!”
“Believe me, that is not the worst part of life.”
“I have no imagination for anything more terrible. What did you do with them?”
“I told the first one I am a lesbian, he never contacted any of our families again which is why I am safe alone ever after.” Lily would really try it if she can afford to lose her job.
“You know I am serious.” Ling admired Lily, that woman could turn any disaster into a joke.
“Seriously, it is not bad to have a try with those set ups, at least you have someone to call if the air conditioner is broken.”
“I’d rather call a plumber instead if I will have my own air conditioner to repair ever.”
“Oh, dear, you got to go out with someone who has a house already.”
“Lily,” Ling really failed to respect her aunt as elder generation, “don’t you remember we are on the same boat?”
“Not exactly, mine is already hopeless sink while they still have hope in yours,” Swiftly set the fried rice on table, Lily continued, “ I don’t think it is a bad thing to you, otherwise how can you get to know people if you spent all your time with those children, their parents and girl colleagues? In the old days when there was no one child policy you may expect a brother if you knew a child, now you might be lucky to have an ancient aunt builds bridge for you.”
“Perfect advice I am looking for.” Ling felt her appetite leaking away.
阿川的译文又来啦！！
2002年六月18号，周二，沈阳
各有苦衷
又到了早上六点，玲醒过来，静静地躺在床上，一点儿不急着起床，周二，一周里唯一的一天不用早起。她周二休息。
这个周末她们一家过得可真火爆。
周五Bamboo约会过后，跟lily阿姨呆了一整晚，接着宣布她的婚礼定在了8月5号。Lily是整个家族里唯一年过35的单身女性，她在最短时间里说服了bamboo 要做出正确的抉择。
什么是真爱？经过多年的追寻和等待，Lily知道永远不可能有所谓的恰到好处的选择，也永远没有什么恰到好处的时机。一个人就是要现实些，趁你有能力，就抓住他，趁你有机会，就抓住他，跟下象棋一样，可能是步臭棋，可是作为棋手，你还有机会和时间去改正，而作为一名旁观者，你或许可以尖叫，却也只能是旁观者。
生活也就那么几十年。Lily在政府机关有份优差，一所不错的寓所，成堆的华贵衣物和化妆品，那又怎样？难过也好，高兴也好，找不到人分享。可是这还不是最糟糕的，真正困扰她的是来自背后的那些女人的指指点点，她们编造各式关于单身老女人的有的没的谣言，某个市长的地下情人，或者天生的性冷淡却不愿意承认等等。
的c98e 保护版权！尊重作者！反对盗版！@ Copyright of 晋江原创网 @
生活的真相同样让Lily灰心。她从来没梦想过白马王子，只要有个人可以聊天，倾听，而不是为了追求她的政府关系，也不是另一个女人的丈夫。这些肯定大大超出了她所能要求的，她没找到这么个人，这件事儿成了耻辱，她为此付出不小的代价，差点儿失去全部家族纽带。
这么多年来，她的三个侄女成了她最好的朋友，因为她们的教育让她们富于情感。可是，她再也不会，永远不会让她们中的任何一个步她的后尘，她将亲自督促此事达成。她们还不了解社会经常针对单身老姑娘的种种龌龊态度，那些被丈夫甩掉的人轻易就能得到同情，甚至泪水，可是，单身女性从来无此殊荣。也就是说，不管跟谁，你得结一次婚。
Bamboo是个诚实的女孩子，太诚实了以至于无需去问她到底是爱那个男孩子还是爱他的钱。邓家里的钱多得都快发霉了，他是家中独子，疯狂地爱着Bamboo，追了她两年多，眼看着她的那些男友来了又走。他话不多，确切来说，太少了；Bamboo的父亲连跟他单独待十分钟都受不了。
这一点也让bamboo很沮丧，不管干什么，他从来没有自己的主意，去哪儿吃午饭，点什么菜，去哪家影院，看什么片子，都是Bamboo说了算，他就跟在身边，顶多点个头，或者问急了就支吾两声算作回答。人长得远远算不上英俊，穿衣服没品味，学习不好，他最擅长的唯一一件事就是如果他真的看好了某件东西，就永不放弃。
他仰慕了bamboo好几年，直到两年前bamboo问他才敢承认，当时bamboo刚被某个男友甩掉。Bamboo 享受不费力得来的金钱，也享受他的陪伴，很轻松，从来不用费脑子选择穿什么，可是一场婚姻有这些就足够了吗？他不懂得交谈，难道每天晚上没完没了地看电视里的超级秀节目？
可怜的姑娘泪水涟涟，擦光了Lily两盒面巾纸才做出了这个重大决定。Lily 好多年没见过bamboo哭了，所以她让她放开了哭。不管怎样，这不会是个容易的决定，因为一旦决定了，反悔的机会很小的。不过生活中是没有什么双赢的吧，这儿得到了，那儿就得失去，永远达不到平衡。
第二天Lily 跟tiffany 谈了谈，这位30岁的成年人正在跟另一位28岁的成年人Bamboo处于孩子气的冷战中。
Lily 明白和她们两个分开谈比一起谈效果好，实际上，Lily 早就知道尽管tiffany听起来很权威，其实三个里面她最弱。
Tiffany受何种教育由父亲一手操办，结婚日期由父亲说了算，住的房子由父亲出钱，她从来没问过自己是否真正想让事情按既定的方向发展，她只是相信自己的父亲应该不会错。正如父亲经常提醒的那样，她是三人中的老大，因为家里没有男孩儿，她必须给另外两个作出表率。
小妹妹玲从来就不是问题少女，可是Bamboo很可怕，毫不夸张地说，她从来没妥协过。Bamboo 对父亲的怒火置之不理，接受了警察培训，并且成了一名女交警，而父亲最终被磨得懒得跟她发火。他已经把她从家里清理出去达半年之久，不过私底下，老人从没忘记提醒lily留神一下Bamboo的男友们，看谁有胆量娶这个野姑娘，用他补充的话来讲，这是把她从他的生活中删除的最佳途径。
那天晚上迟些时候，Tiffany 跟Roc 和玲分享了这个消息，她被结婚日期震呆了，还没恢复过来。
“8月5号，她到底有没有搞错，你还记不记得我们花了多久来准备婚礼？”她冲着Roc 问，“通知所有的亲戚朋友，拍婚纱照，买新房里的一切必需品，体检，订酒店，租婚车，找乐队和摄影师，天哪，我们怎么可能在一个月内安排好所有这一切？”如果因此被认为她没有能力组织好妹妹的婚礼，她绝对不能忍受。
玲和Roc好笑地互相看了一眼，“你确定你是在为Bamboo的婚礼担心？”Roc 逗妻子说，他很内疚，因为自己的骄傲引起了两姐妹的冷战。
“她是个可恶的小野人，可她毕竟也是咱家的一员。”这是Tiffany能给出的最好的评价了。
“所以你打算跟Bamboo讨论讨论，好让所有这一切按部就班？”Roc 想再推她一把。
“等我准备好了，当然会告诉她怎么安排的。”Roc 摇摇头，不是反对，而是放弃。一个心理医生只在两个领域需要求助于同行：涉及家庭和本人，而后者比前者更容易处理。
“有没有人告诉爸妈？如果这种消息不及时通知他们，那么婚礼最后有可能举行不了，往小处说，至少举行得不顺利。”玲发誓她不是试图给Bamboo的婚姻设障碍，听到这天大的消息却高兴不起来的大有人在，她父亲保证还在狂怒中没消气呢。
“我本想自己有这个机会告诉他们，可是Lily已经说了。爸当然很高兴，第二个女儿终于也在30岁以前被摆脱了。”平生第一次，她意识到对于父亲热衷于把女儿们嫁出去这件事儿她是多么感激。“你也急着从老爸身边逃走吧？”Tiffany 觉察到小妹的焦虑，拿她黑色幽默了一把（开涮）。时间像在飞，小妹妹都23岁了。
“哦，只要他不踢我出家门，再过一百万年我也不急。”玲真的被吓坏了，顾不得欣赏Tiffany的幽默感。
第二天她的恶梦成真了，住在附近小镇上的父母开着吉普车赶到了沈阳，邀请几家亲戚和三个女儿外加一个正牌女婿和一个准女婿在火锅城聚餐，以此来宣扬一位父亲又成功送出一个女儿的自豪感。亲戚们实在对邓很满意，那个年纪的人十分赞赏少说多做的年轻人，除此之外，他们刚刚得知邓的父亲新近被提拔为中某工某银行沈阳分行的行长，怪不得这家子的钱多得要长毛了。
晚餐吃起来没完没了，等到白酒，啤酒和红酒一路冲上这些人的脑袋，话题已经被衍伸得无所不包。玲从来不敢学Bamboo那样装病离席，Bamboo以前经常这么做，可是今晚不行，她不能把未婚夫扔下不管，那些叔叔们的眼闪啊闪的，光看见钱了，如果她把邓单独留下，那么他可能会点头应承办理十笔无上限贷款。
在这节骨眼儿上，玲犯了个错误。某位叔叔第N次填满每个人的酒杯时，她拒绝了。于是这位叔叔突然意识到玲的存在，他们从一开始竟然忽略了她。就这样，询问从她的个人情况开始，到她的教育和工作状况，直到不可避免地谈到她的恋爱状况。
“还没有男朋友？你父亲应该早点儿告诉我们，我们会帮忙的。”有位叔叔信誓旦旦。
“呣，我的工作要花费很多时间和精力，我觉得没时间再去做别的事儿了。”玲试着解救自己，同时给了Tiffany一个求助信号。
“说得对，玲现在应该多花时间干事业，”第一波帮助来自Bamboo.
“而且她也太小了。”Tiffany也明白了她的求助。只有玲需要的时候，另外两个姐妹才能精诚合作。
“得啦，别说了，你们俩已经是我们家正经的晚婚一族啦。你表妹跟你们同龄，22岁就结婚，现在我们的外孙子都5岁了。”有位阿姨一句话击退了两位援手，然后她转向玲，“23岁不算小了。你得想想你的将来，事业能带给你什么？一个受敬重的女人必须得有家庭，抚育子女。”
这下子，不光玲听着白了脸，Lily的脸色也变了。可是这位主攻手不晓得适可而止，“你也不想成为另一个Lily，对吧？”她接茬往下说。
Lily再也受不了了，连三姐妹也怒了。
“如果能成为跟Lily完全一样的人而不是另一个Lily，我会很高兴。”玲率先发动反攻，因为她的问题导致Lily被拖下水实在抱歉，而且上帝呀，她压根没有什么问题。
“如果Lily自己觉得事业和生活很美满，别人为什么不能同样为她高兴？”这回是Tiffany。
“即使她不是每时每刻都高兴，别人也是一样的啊。至少她从来不必为了做个美容去斗争。”Bamboo的反击一如既往的犀利，为第一轮辩护划上句号。她知道这位主攻手的丈夫出了名的小气。
“天呐，大哥，”主攻手向三姐妹的父亲寻求公正，“你这仨孩子这是什么态度啊？或者说她们对你也是这态度？ ”不象质疑倒像谴责，“Lily是我表妹，什么时候我还没权利说说这些没长大的侄女啦？”听听，纯粹的受害者。
“现在又说我们没长大了，刚刚你还说玲已经不年轻了。”这次是Tiffany和bamboo一起。
“够了！”她们的父亲脸都绿了，“Tiffany, 你这种说话做事方式很让我失望，跟个没教养的野孩子似的，还有你，”他冲着玲去了，“从资本家手里挣几个臭钱就性情大变，我真不该同意你辞去公立小学的教职。现在向你阿姨道歉。”
碍于各自的伴侣在场的情面，两个姐姐选择了无声抗议策略。
最后还是玲和Lily道了歉。如果因为她们而破坏了家庭聚餐，她们俩都会负疚的。她们为此付出了代价，事实上，她们还得不断付下去，俩人同意了由家族相亲关系网马上给各自安排的一次相亲。
“哦，真是一场恶梦呀。”周一很忙，玲成功地将此事忽略过去，可是现在，她意识到了她们给自己找了多大的麻烦。别想装病，她总不能天天长病吧。而且，她真正害怕的不是跟个陌生男士吃顿相亲饭，而是随之而来的诸多事端。为了打住这种愚蠢的相亲会，她得从中确定一位长期来往的对象。为此她问Lily有何见解。
“这么多年你到底怎么熬过来的？”当晚傍晚时分，玲在Lily的公寓里问，她正准备享用一顿美味晚餐，这次无须她亲自下厨挥舞炒勺。
“什么熬过来？”
“那些相亲会！”
“相信我，这不是生活中最糟的一部分。”
“我想象不出还有什么更可怕的事儿。你怎么应对他们？”
“我告诉第一个我是个同性恋，从那以后他不再跟咱们家任何人打交道，这就是为什么这么多年安然无事的原因。”如果能承担得了失去工作的后果，Lily真想试试同性恋。
“你知道我在认真问你，”玲服了Lily，这女人能把任何一种灾难化作笑谈。
“认真来讲，试试那些相亲会也不坏，至少空调坏了的话，你知道打电话找谁。”
“如果我有一天会有自己的空调可修，我宁可打电话叫电工。”
“噢，亲爱的，你当然要找个有房子的人交往。”
“Lily，” 玲确实做不到拿她当长辈来敬重，“难道你不记得我们俩是一一条船上的？”
“不完全是，我的船已经毫无希望，沉了，而他们对你的还寄予厚望，”Lily麻利地把炒饭摆桌上，接着说，“我觉得这事儿对你来说不错，要不你把时间都花在那些孩子们，他们的父母还有你的女同事身上了，怎么能认识外人呢？搁在过去，没有独生子女政策，你认识个孩子还能寄希望于她/他有哥哥，现在有个老阿姨给你搭桥就算运气了。”
“这可真是我想要的完美的建议啊。”玲觉得自己的胃口跑了个光光。
作者有话说
第5章 18th June Tuesday 2002 Shenyang
，还差 