《On The Same Days》橄榄树

31、28th January Tuesday 2003 Amsterdam

　　Erop of eronder (Up or down)

　　It was the Chinese Lunar New Year, equal to Dutch Christmas. Tina was working in Happy Concern as every other normal day.

　　No, don’t congratulate her; she hadn’t got the offer for a working permit. She had talked with Van de Heuvel on the first working day after New Years holiday. With the left over courage and boldness from the 3 bowl of fried flies from Lisa, Tina went directly into Van de Heuvel’s office that morning well prepared to tell him what she had on her mind, which was she’d never stay in his little firm for long even if he begs her to. Van de Heuvel was on the phone with someone, talking German. Saw his empty coffee cup, Tina took it and made another cup of black coffee for him, she always believed a good last impression was even better than first impression, even with a good first impression one may still has doubts, while a good last impression it means doubts were all cleared and only trust would be left.

　　Set the coffee on his table, Tina settled herself in that soft chair across Van de Heuvel, listening to him chatting and laughing in English, French sometimes Spanish. She had to admit that wasn’t an ordinary man. He spoke 7 languages, even a few sentences of Chinese, dealing with the Chinese for years on his own, basically selling to everywhere in Europe by himself as well, managed the little near bankrupted firm into profit and expanded his office building up to the second floor from the 0th in just a few years time, He definitely got the brains, Tina concluded. He used trainees from the HAS for quite some years, only those who spoke some other languages than he did and able to open a piece of market somewhere for him.
　　The Dutch born Spanish girl just completed her internship a few weeks ago after the connection with a big Spanish Retail chain, she was allowed to come back to write her thesis, but she wasn’t hired as long term employee, her task was to knock the Spanish door open and she had done it and that was all. The Russian girl who sold loads to Russia and Poland hadn’t got any offer of a working permit either. She was still a wanderer who does not know what she really wanted, Van de Heuvel had said. But the truth was, he had got what he wanted from them and what they wanted weren’t his problem, a business man indeed.

　　“Sorry for the waiting. How do you know I wanted to have a talk with you?” Van de Heuvel hung up the phone and apologized.
　　“Because I also wanted to have a talk with you, elites often thought the same you know.” Tina wished she indeed knew what John was thinking at that particular moment; then she’d never give him the chance to talk first.
　　“Elite storm, I wanted to tell you how much do I appreciate what you have done for me, China trip was a success, the placement report is extraordinary, (not a very bad start, Tina nodded and smiled, but extraordinarily bad or good?)You have been very honest, also critical; I hadn’t realized my company had that many problems or potential problems before. (He wasn’t implying she brought the problems, was he?) I have shared a lot of things with you that I never shared with any of my employees here, (was he clear in his head? Was he sure who he was talking to? Why couldn’t she remember any intimating moments?) I knew what you want, (how? She never mentioned a word of working permit in office) Happy Concern is a small firm, it may never turn into Shell, neither Philips, (but if he really wants to make her a big fish…) your are very ambitious, (maybe he hasn’t that many brains after all if he couldn’t see through her pretence) you dreams lie far above where we are, (she indeed never saw him in her dreams) but please, do accept my request, (say it, say it, offer me, offer me!) please keep me posted of your master program and get in touch every now and than as friends.

　　“Sure, I will definitely do.” Tina managed keep the smile and nods with aching tooth a few seconds later after she realized what was happening, he had just fired her exactly the same as every other previous trainee. The blind Kui Lao! Now he thought she might come to beg him to stay, even made a cup of coffee for that. What the hell!

　　“Now what did you want to talk about?” he asked innocently with a warm smile,
　　“Exactly the same as you, elites thought indeed the same.” She had the urge to crash his smile, god, even if he offered, she wouldn’t/mightn’t accept, but he hadn’t even offered at all for such an elite who had done that much for him; that was completely another matter. A real cunning fox is that, as if he knew precisely what had played in her head and enjoyed his best chance crashing the only property she still had---a few pieces of proud bones.

　　“When will you go for a master program? You still need to write a thesis, right?” Van de Heuvel wondered if he could ask the Chinese to stay for a few more months as he’d need to find a Dutch employee take over her job, he remembered she had enough credit points except a thesis to graduate.

　　“I do need to write a thesis, but won’t be here, so don’t be afraid, I have a totally different topic.” This time she took the chance, god, was he wondering if she’d even beg to stay for another few months?

　　“But you don’t have to attend courses anymore in the HAS, do you?” sometimes Van de Heuvel couldn’t get it; the Chinese he had been dealing with were never so defensive like Tina, “I’d just like to ask if you can stay for a few months more, you still need to make money, do you?”

　　“Thanks for your generosity, but I will find my own way. I won’t stay for one extra day.” She had lived up to the day before Happy Concern with no problems, who did he think that he was?

　　“But I need to find someone to replace you, and I myself will be traveling a lot next month, the new comer will need to be trained.” Van de Heuvel knew he pulled the wrong trigger again; he shouldn’t have made sounded like doing her a favor.

　　“Let’s make it clear than, I am not asking you any favor, please find someone as soon as possible; I will stay at maximum for one extra month.”

　　“Dear proud elite storm, sometimes one shouldn’t oversell himself. Why fight against mutual benefits?” he really meant to help the little Chinese to be more reasonable and practical.
　　“The extra month is gone.”
　　“Okay, it is me who is asking you for a favor, I am begging you. You are clumsy, stupid and ridiculous with your 4000 years civilization, but please stay for some extra time.” He knew better not to teach her business is business all at once.

　　Trembling and shaking, Tina went back to her office; scrunch up in her chair behind the computer. One of her regular Dutch colleagues greeted “Morgen Tina, alles kits?”
　　“Perfect!” Tina smiled her tooth aching smile back.

　　That was back a few weeks ago already, given two more weeks, the extra month she promised will be expired; she would be officially unemployed again. Van de Heuvel had indeed interviewed loads Dutch applicants, he just told her after greeted her happy Chinese New Year that a new boy would come next week; Tina would coach him for a week. And that would be it. End of the placement. Tina started to sort out her documents in the computer, deleting all the Chinese junks.

　　Opened her mail box, even more junks, full irritation Tina deleted loads mails from that dating website full of “who I am, what am I looking for, blablabla,” it was all Lisa’s fault, Tina shouldn’t have posted her profile there, or she shouldn’t have attached that picture of facing the sea while backing to the camera, it turned out her “back” was so attractive that everyone started to wonder how scary the front could be.
　　Tina was rather shocked; she never knew that there’d be that many men hopelessly fishing in the cyber world for a one night stand or whatever, if they were serious, they were losers!!! If they weren’t serious, they were swindlers!!!

　　A New Years greeting card, must be from Ling, Tina opened it, a picture of stunning white whale in the sea, with a piece of message,
　　“Hi, there, why didn’t you jump in? If it wasn’t the camera behind you, I’d have jumped out of the water…
　　Happy Chinese New Year! John”

　　Okay, brother, you asked for it, Tina smiled evilly at the joke; she hadn’t got a scapegoat in real life, a scape-whale on line would be perfect to let off, anyway she hadn’t jumped in the sea ever to look for it. So she accepted his MSN request.

　　“Hello, fish, is John your real name? How many nights-stands are you looking for?”
　　“I never lie as it is too difficult to cover it. Besides, we also have our normen en waarden.”
　　“What a surprise! Is net-chatting one of the nevers?”
　　“Now I know what you get if you greeted a Chinese a happy new year. Why have you put your profile on line then?”
　　“hmm…a research over…net dating psychology...”
　　“Which part of China are you from?”
　　“You know Shenyang?”
　　“No.”
　　“You know Beijing?”
　　“Yeah,”
　　“11 hours by train up North.”
　　“Cold there?”
　　“40 C minus,”
　　“Were you born there alive?”
　　“Till that summer I was.”
　　“???”
　　“40 C plus”
　　“Have many summers out of 24 have you been dying there?”
　　“22”
　　“What have you been doing here up to now?”
　　“To get lost,”
　　“From what?”
　　“Myself and everything else,”
　　“Are you?”
　　“???”
　　“Successfully lost?”
　　“Lost? Yes; successfully? Not.”
　　“You’re funny,”
　　“Meaning I am a clown?”
　　“Meaning you made me laugh”
　　“Laugh creates more wrinkles.”
　　“What would you do to celebrate your new year if you are in China?”
　　“Send lanterns to graveyard; burn paper money for the death; eat loads dumplings under fireworks,”
　　“How are you going to celebrate your new year here?”
　　“Tear-washing my pillow, or eat junk cheese, get drunk, go high in a café next to red light district in clogs.”
　　“How many bikes did you lose? You may hate the wrong people you know, it might be Germans who stole them…”
　　“Chinese are close friends with Oost Indische, maar wij doen niet doof.”
　　“Seriously, what are you doing here?”
　　“Studie zonder financiering,”
　　“Psychology?”
　　“Business administration”
　　“So it is no research?”
　　“But a joke,” by that Tina had to stop and go to AH with colleagues for lunch, everyday queue up there for 3 quarter of an hour for some stink cheese, junk bread, smashed lever pate plus some boxes of hagelslag, another 3 quarter of an hour sitting around the conference table chewing the garbage and making blue jokes. Van de Heuvel referred the nearly 2 hours’ daily waste as team spirit, to make the staff more at home. Tina wondered if everyone else was also that eager to dash back to their computer at home after lunch leaving all the dishes piled up in the kitchen, not only men, also women, she credited herself another point for her choice to be in Holland, at least women considered themselves as equals of men.
　　Though man probably thought otherwise, The just falling apart Dutch cabinet only had one female minister mightn’t prove anything as women in general were all too clever than man to bother playing politics at all, but there weren’t really that many woman among the directors of all those Dutch multinationals either, that might say a lot.

　　Tina cleaned the dishes by herself as she often did, without calling for anyone to help. It wasn’t that much work anyway, 100 times less than in Happy Food.

　　Lisa called in the afternoon, to invite her over for dinner as Cathy was back to Sweden.
　　Anna called also, to invite Tina out for the Chinese New year. Tina told each of them that she accepted the other’s invitation already days ago. She knew she wasn’t in the mood to get any personal touch at the moment, she had no idea how to tell them that she is not get the working permit, that she absolutely had no clue how to go on further after the HAS. But she called home with the dragon card, she had to. The 9 years old son of Peace picked up the phone and shouted with extreme excitement among the cracking sounds of fireworks, “Auntie, I have got 8 red envelopes, each has 1 Yuan RMB in it, I can buy loads new pencils, even a new pair of sneakers, what do you get there auntie?”
　　Loads white envelopes threatening your auntie to pay, knew better not to say it, Tina answered, “How great you got 8 Yuan, (less than one Euro, she couldn’t help the automatic exchange rate system in her head) Auntie didn’t get any because Kui Lao’s don’t celebrate Chinese new year here.”
　　“What!? They are not burning fire works now?”
　　“NO.”
　　“No fans dance? a kind of north China’s folk dance with fancy fans in hands, celebrates new year .
　　“NO.”
　　“Not eating dumplings?” No Red paper cuts on the wall? No lanterns like stars in the forest behind us? No children play poker with you the whole night through?”
　　“NO.”
　　“Why are you staying there? Why don’t you just come back? You can share a few red envelopes with me.” The nephew got seriously concerned,
　　“Dear, auntie promise to come back with loads red envelopes for you someday.”

　　“Nobody asked you to do that, Tsing, you must understand the family will be more happy if you are here with us now.” Tina’s father had took over the phone,
　　“Uh, I know, father, actually I was home with you a month ago, how is everything? How is it going with the hoodlum chief accident? How are Joyce and Clear Moon? How is my mother, how are you?”

　　“We are all just fine, take good care of yourself there; do you want to talk with your mother?”

　　“Sure,” Tina knew her mother must be standing there waiting, every time she called home, they’d all shout a few sentences to her, just a few, nothing more, for fear that the huge telephone bill might kill her, no matter how hard she explained about the cheap dragon card, 10 Euros you can talk for 2 hours. 10 Euros? 100 RMB? Cheap??! They were still shocked. New Year was a special occasion; the whole family gave Tina a circulation of “Prosperous New Year.”

　　Tina went home very late that evening, the train was almost empty. Tina picked up a copy of Metro from the garbage tin for a glance, some Palestinian suicide bomber killed some Israeli civilians in a restaurant, god, she hadn’t got any e-mails from the daughter and granddaughter of Wilma since they went back. Mr. Sharon denied his troops killed loads Palestinian civilians by Gaza, Mr. Bush said he’d push the peace process; that Jews and Muslims would have to live happily together as long as America wouldn’t be in danger of oil shortage. That weapon inspectors had to be allowed into Iraq.
　　Someone’s phone rang, a Dutch lady was answering the phone, “Yes, I am sitting in the train, the train was delayed for 15 minutes, I will be there over half an hours time, yes, yes, I will see you at the entrance, yes, I have got the ticket.”

　　Tina went on further with her Metro, the re-election ended, the dead gay politicians party LPF ran all the way down the hill from 26 seats to 8 seats, seemed people got their common sense back again, not everyone who saw the symptoms of a patient could be a doctor, doctor had to give prescriptions.

　　The lady was on the phone again, “Yes, I am still sitting in the train, I will be there over a quarter’s time, have you walked the dog? Ok, good, he indeed needed a bath today; don’t forget to switch the answering machine on…”

　　Tina remembered the black dog back home in the village had fiercely barked to her for the first 3 days as he thought she was a invader of the family, finally stopped it after she fed him 2 bowls of chicken bones after a dinner, he turned to be very grateful to Tina as he mostly just treated with left over soups.

　　There it came, the article over animal rights in China; a picture of some demonstrators holding flags and boards saying China’s dogs were not properly treated. Tina knew for sure if that black dog home gets ill, her 9 years old nephew would cry like hell, yet the dog would still be sold or killed for meat, how would these demonstrators understood that there were still people suffering from hunger?

　　More news about China, an earthquake in Gan Su, Western China killed 400 hundreds people, loads families became roofless in the cold winter on the Chinese new years eve, Red Cross went there; a bus accident killed 9 passengers eager to go home for the new years celebration.

　　Tina’s mobile beeped after she changed to the tram, a message: “I was there, by your new year! Just had dumplings with friends in a Chinese restaurant. Lekker!—John”

　　“Hi, fish, aren’t you ashamed to eat your own families? Fillings of the dumplings here must be shrimps.”
　　“I heard you have very strong family ties in China?”
　　“We do.”
　　“Are they happy you are here at your new years eve?”
　　“They are happy if I am.”
　　“You are so brief with answers about yourself; I am interested in your culture.”
　　“The library card doesn’t cost that much, you may even read free there, loads books about Chinese ancient traditions and culture revolutions.”
　　“I am also interested in now, aside from the history.”
　　“Sorry, but I am a product between now and the history.” So did Tina think about herself sometimes, she wasn’t even close to the new modern generation Chinese in big cities, they ride motorcycles, sing karaoke’s, dates in cinemas and attending piano courses, compared to them, she must be a piece of antique, with a vital flaw, that she wasn’t too aware of the history either, she felt broken to read those cultural revolution stories.

　　Tina stopped sending SMS back, walked from the tram stop home along the smelly canal, what was the point to waste energy on explaining a Dutch guy (if exists at all) about her culture? What was culture exactly? People here saw Chinese talking loud laughing a lot in trams, all eating in Chinese restaurants, living in the same neighborhood, no interference in politics, therefore they’d just reckon Chinese culture was narrow minded- narrow socialized- indifferent -noisy -collectivism among their own bunch. How could she explain, one had to live in a bunch to know about the bunch. But, a shame that still didn’t got a clear idea what the Dutch culture really was though she had lived in the bunch for more than a whole year.