《On The Same Days》橄榄树

18、4th October Friday 2002 Amsterdam

　　Dat was kiele-kiele! (Just about perfect)

　　Excitedly walking from the bedroom to the living room, then from the kitchen to the balcony, there was even an attic up to the 5th floor, Tina’s nerve went really mad, she tried her very best not to smile like an idiot and nods at all whatever noises he was making without catching all whatever he was talking about.

　　This was going to be her house, hers, registered under her name, god, Tina must have been a real sincere nun with extraordinary contribution in her last life to deserve any good luck like this now.

　　She was such a bad person that she even didn’t realize her National Day on 1st October, she just simply forgot the annual celebration in the past 20 years, she didn’t even deserve to be a Chinese. Right outside of the canal that defines the center of Amsterdam, this house lies in Amsterdam west, about 6 minutes tram from the Leids Square-center of the city, 5 minutes walking distance to the north entrance of the Vondel park, god, nothing could be more perfect.

　　“We still need to sign the contract,” Anton, the house owner who didn’t speak much English said, Tina nodded with her idiotic smile, face almost aching,

　　“As you are a friend of our friend, we will not ask for deposits.” He continued, Tina nods more vigorously, her neck started aching too, thank god that little Chinese became an orphan, which not only brought herself good luck to be adopted but also brought Tina a roof. What a network.

　　“I will need your salary proof and passport copies next week, you may pick up the key after I arranged the new tenant registration with the Woningdienst.” Tina kept nodding, she stepped back a bit from him, just to soften her 45 degreed backward aching neck a bit, this man must be over 2 meters tall.

　　“How long have you been here?” he wondered if he was understood at all as no sounds came out from this overexcited nodding worm.

　　“A whole year already,” She stopped nodding, might this be a problem? That she wasn’t a permanent resident?

　　“Wat vine dat you already understand Dutch, it iz a difficult language.” He relieved, “you know those Chinese who stayed here for more dan 20 years still talking Flied Lice instead of Flied lice!”
　　Tina turned red on those words, not only because she indeed was ashamed of those Chinglish, but also to keep back her laugh, though she didn’t change the R into L, but she couldn’t roll them like a motor either as the Dutch did.
　　But, what the hell, he asked her in broken English “how late vil dey meet,” instead of “when will they meet?” hoe laat is when in Dutch, so they just literately changed hoe laat to how late.
　　“Nou, ja, niets is makelijk.(nothing is easy)” Tina managed something neutral; she wouldn’t let anything destroy the day, her day.

　　As the room was empty so they have nowhere to sit down, that saved Tina from drowning in any of those meaningless yet endless typical Dutch conversations on every corner of the streets over bad weather or coziness.

　　She headed back to Anna for the great news. She took half a day off from Happy Concern for this appointment to look at the house. Her colleagues obviously suspected the authenticity of her case. They’d more believe it if she said only the attic up the 5th floor would be where she was going to live.

　　500 Euros per month, everything inclusive might mount to 700. For a house of that size in that area legally registered, that was unbelievably cheap, so cheap that Tina felt guilty of her good luck, she’d die of guilty if she let the good luck walk away due to her bank account that was in the red.
　　Thought about her finance, she almost ran into a car when she crosses the street absentmindedly, the driver in the car suspiciously stared at her and waving her to go across the street first.
　　God, she felt nauseas, like that drunken hooligan staggering out of the bar vomiting in the chilly wind, she couldn’t afford such a cheap place at all. What must she do to pay the rent upfront every month? She only get 600 from Happy Concern while two third already paid upfront on trains.
　　Besides she had to buy flowers for Anna and whoever else that invited her for dinner, buy gifts for friend’s and colleagues’ birthdays, pay for tuition and rotten breads. Even with the weekends waitressing money she wouldn’t make it, the only way was to rent one room out, to share it with somebody else.
　　But sub-renting was illegal here, even if the owner ever agreed, which would be most unlikely if not impossible, the Woningdienst might raid a check every now and then making trouble.

　　Ling was asking her why Tina had insisted to have a double aged boy friend if ever at all. Did she ever thought be become a stepmother?
　　God almighty, were Ling’s parents already so desperate that they were match making their daughter with some divorced father?
　　God, she had to call her own family later on, just to check if they in case sold her to any of the fellow farmers in the village for some free labor in the busy autumn, as her mother were sold to her father for the 3 bags of rice.

　　She told Ling never care about her parents match making operation, that Ling got to learn once in her life to make her very own decision of what she really wanted, didn’t she remember the accident? Life could be as short.

　　Though Tina felt a bit more guilty to the nice crazy pare of antique parents of Lings, she believed she did the right thing, she couldn’t imagine Ling to be even close with any kind of terrible stepmother, Ling was such a sweet heart.

　　Some London located old classmate, a friend of the boy she picked up and sent to Leiden wrote her a beautiful e-mail saying that Tina had always been some determined, dedicated heroine and asked if she my accommodate and show him around Amsterdam if he would come for a visit. She refused him friendly saying she was staying over in a handicapped friend’s family for the time being, far from any typical brave Chinese heroine with Kong Fu at the moment as she was infected with a heavy flu.

　　Helen and her Turkish Dutch boy friend got more and more tense, they were in the process of getting “samenwonen (living together)”, the employer of the Turkis boy hadn’t declare yet if he’d get a one year contract, without that the city hall wouldn’t register their samenwonen-ship, without the samenwonen-ship the labor bureau wouldn’t issue Helen a working permit, without the working permit even a social uncle’s Taiwanese company wouldn’t dare to use her.

　　The worst was that Helen’s boyfriend wanted very badly to continue a master program as he hated very much the company he now worked in, but for the sake of Helen’s residence, he couldn’t do that, he couldn’t do what he wanted to do. He was making some kind of sacrifice for her. While Helen thought she was making the sacrifice of staying in Holland at all for him. It was getting harder and harder to smile at each other these days, she said, every sentence could be explosive, she stopped asking how it was at his work, he stopped inquiring how it was with her day. Both full of irritation and anxiety.

　　Tina signed, she didn’t really know how to answer this mail, she knew long ago that no relationship would be fine if anyone of the two was after the other one for something, be money, property or in this case maybe identity. Life was complicated, you’d fight to get something, you’d fight to lose it and you’d fight about the loss. That was what she wrote to Helen; god knows what did that all mean.

　　There was a mail from Laura from Shanghai. She was coming in the second half of October for a few days with the twins. The twin’s father must deal something with the head office here again.
　　Laura told a story of a Chinese girl friend of her who married with one of those rich divorced Dutch fellow, director of one of those AH supermarket chains, they had to sign a contract prior to their marriage agreeing that the wife would get 10 thousand Euros for compensation upon divorce, not one cent more or less. What the hell kind of mentality was that? Why bother marry at all if both were so ready to divorce if not eager? Now that girl had to work in the AH market to earn her own allowance.

　　Laura was so shocked, and felt so lucky that the twins’ father never asked for such kind of an arrangement with her, otherwise how would she live if she is left with the twins one day forever? God, that AH director was a big bastard, and that Chinese girl friend was an idiot, commented Laura.

　　Gave a deep sigh, Tina knew she’d follow Lisa and Cathy’s way of life with whatever kind of cost, there’d never be a way that you might be happy to live under someone else’s roof. Tina knew Laura had followed some higher education too, otherwise she wouldn’t be able to speak English, but she also knew she couldn’t really suggest Laura to attend any training program at this stage with the twins, maybe Laura should buy a lot of Dutch books to read for the children at their bed time, but then, what kind of broken Chin-Dutch would the twins learn then?

　　Before she closed her mail box she refreshed it one more time, there it came, a mail from HAS accommodation administration, there was a room free for her in Andreazus ziekenhuis (hospital) apartment, those rooms were originally built for nurses. Apparently HAS rented those extra ones to locate its increasing amount of international students. 325 Euro per month, 400 euros deposit. Call for confirmation compulsory within two days.

　　“I have two pieces of good news to tell you, a big one and a small one.” Later she came down to talk with Anna after the visitors were gone and she cleaned the dishes.

　　“Exactly the same I have to tell you.” Anna lay in bed with piles of book aside,
　　“Then you first,”

　　“No, tell me about the house, where is it? How big? Did you sign the contract?” Anna had always warned Tina that in this country you had to set everything on paper.

　　“Not a very big house, it has everything though, near your studio actually, but up to 700 a month probably, which are the big good news part, the small one is that I am getting an apartment from the HAS in a hospital nurse room for 325 around the same area.”

　　“But HAS apartment is only available for one year. You have to hunt for a roof again next year, is it?” Anna is more giving a fact than asking a question, “that is no choice at all, you must take the house. Do you know how rare such an opportunity ever comes by, even for Dutch people?”

　　“I know, I know, I will do my best. Now cheer me up with your good news.” Tina doesn’t want to talk about her bank account balance with Anna.
　　The poor old woman (in her very apart artistic dress, not even close to old, but how would you find any other excuse to pity her a bit, the crazy women in her wheelchair was even stronger than the majority of the walking creatures) had enough worries of her own, she couldn’t employ herself to use heavy hammers or any other sculpturing tools for quite a while which means she’d be workless, but all the bills for keeping the house, the car, food and so on had to be paid as usual.
　　Although the writer brother of Anna, Jack, had offered to lend her money, Anna didn’t take the offer. She just couldn’t get use to the idea to be dependent, on whoever it might be. Tina felt so ashamed that she couldn’t help, Anna said shut up every time she mentioned about paying a rent, not that she could really afforf much anyway.

　　“I get a big assignment and a small assignment.” Anna smiled at the puzzled face of her Chinese child, very well aware of what sort of worry was playing in that mind.

　　“No, you can’t take those project yet, you must give that poor hip of yours necessary time to heal. Hammers and stones are always there for you to destroy when you can stand up again.” Tina had to try to stop this crazy women, who did she think she was? A robot? Working with 3 screws in her hip?

　　“Listen, the big assignment for the Rein Church pays 75,000 euros in total, 20% up front, I beat more than a hundred sculptors for that, you have to be happy for me, I know for sure by the time that I have to complete the project next year I’d be running around like a lunatic already. Right now I can work on the phone, arrange the stones and have it cut by the stone mansion. I wouldn’t use my hip much, though it may well need some practice. My physiotherapist said that I could try to walk with sticks next week! ”

　　Anna was still so excited at the big news, full of enthusiasm, though there was no certain standard to judge art, but she couldn’t help but be very happy at the fact that it was her design out of hundreds of others’ that got the recognition.

　　“Hit me with the other project now,”
　　“A gift project for a company, they want to have 200 little marble sculptors as Christmas gifts for their clients, I am almost ready with the sample, just hand made, no hip efforts at all, but no way that I can make 200 of them, therefore I wonder if I may employ your free time in the evening or weekends?”

　　“Don’t kid me, I have never learned art, never ever made one piece of artwork, you may need to pay the company double the price they are willing to pay you to compensate the customer relations damage.” Tina meant serious, she had no choice to go to an art school; it was too expensive, now it’d be too late to even think about it.

　　“It is thousands times easier than any of your project in the HAS, you have a ready model to copy from so that your brains may have a little rest, besides that would be a big help for me. We will both make something out of it, such as to pay our houses, otherwise we both get nothing.” Anna was determined.

　　“How about those students of yours in training program, you could ask them to do it for practice, you don’t even have to pay them, yes, isn’t it a great idea?” Tina shouted.

　　“No way, they are no slaves, I wouldn’t take that advantage either, you nod your head, there will be a project, you sway, we both at a loss.”
　　“This is blackmail. I am not going to move my head at all. It is your project, I do what you say.”
　　“Deal,” They crossed their little fingers as Tina learned Anna when they were in Shenyang. Tina admired Anna already, but never so much. The crazy woman was not only saving her own house in a wheelchair but also Tina’s.

　　Dinner was cooked by Sandra, ex-wife of a very good friend of Anna, who turned into a Buddhist after her husband walked away with a younger richer girl. She talked the whole night over meditations, causes and consequences.

　　The poor women must haven’t worked out yet that being a Buddhist would neither save a husband back, nor get a new one, male Buddhists were monks, weren’t they?

　　That ex-husband was here too with his current wife the other day, one among that million Dutch parasites who stood on that list called WAO, one among 50% of that million who physically healthy as a donkey yet insisted on mental disability to refuse any chance to work, what the hell the two wives thought that he was?
　　Bloody shameful bastard was that. Tina cursed him full hearted while listening to Sandra’s soft yet desperate Dutch Buddhist voice like floating river with her throat as dam. God, Tina never knew she could ever come up with this kind of inspiration. She might be good enough to be a Buddhist too.

　　Cleaning the dishes again, Tina smiled at the fact how normal an artist’s life is.
　　Anna didn’t even have a dishwasher, those painters or sculptors in China were living like Kings and Queens even with waitresses at home…

　　What is it in China that made arts expensive? What it in Holland that made arts cheap?

　　The scarcer something is, the valuable it would be treated. Did that mean China hadn’t enough arts and artists? Or was it because of the exchange rate?
　　If arts has the same value overall the world, then many artists would worth a lot of RMB in China to live a very expensive life in that cheap country. While artists here might worth the same the same, but in euro terms and in a very expensive country made them hardly able to escape from a cheap life.

　　Shouldn’t she recommend Anna to go over and stay in China as a proud Queen from Holland? Anna would gain even more attention and respect from those Chinese folks than Beatrix can get here from the Dutch, because most Dutch people were so independent and self-centered that they wouldn’t even care whatever kind of somebody you are.

　　Near 11, she had no idea since when was she so depend on the watch, she check the time every other half an hour at least, as if she could do something with it if she was late for anything, as a matter of fact, so far only more stressful if you knew you’d be late yet there was nothing you can do about it.
　　She checked her wrist with double frequency if she forgot the watch some day, she was not the one who’d ever open her mouth to ask a stranger for time, and absolutely not asking any male creature as it was such an old cliché to flirt.
　　Yet the other day near the central library a guy did approached her with the stupid excuse, Tina just pretended that she neither understood English nor Dutch till the guy made a gesture to check his wrist then pointed at her watch disappointed that she was a deaf mute, she made an expression of sudden enlightenment and showed him her watch then disappeared in the library.

　　Switched the TV on, browsing all the channels, disgusted by the sex program of V8, yet curiously watched for quite a few minutes, she’d never ever have a child grown up in this country, to be polluted or even damaged at too early a stage of life.